


Normal

by hatebeat



Series: Putting the gears in motion [29]
Category: Metalocalypse
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-09
Updated: 2014-08-09
Packaged: 2018-02-12 09:40:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,293
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2104917
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hatebeat/pseuds/hatebeat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>August, 1988. Nathan's life returns to normal.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Normal

When Nathan went in for his session one day, he supposed he had some vague sense of time that had told him that his six weeks in the program were almost up, but he hadn't necessarily been counting the days. It didn't matter in here, and come to think of it, it didn't matter _out there_ , either, did it?

But when he was coaxed into Mr. Fox's office that day, he was still surprised to hear that he was going to be released in a week.

Nathan blinked and his eyebrows wrinkled together in the middle, but he said nothing, like maybe he was still trying to process it.

"Well, Nathan? How do you feel about that?" 

Nathan was quiet, but Mr. Fox was patient with him. Over the past five weeks, Mr. Fox had learned how to wait for Nathan to be ready to talk, or something. He said shit like that, anyway. Most of the time, Nathan still just had no idea what that guy ever wanted him to say.

The silence stretched on for enough minutes that Mr. Fox started to write something down in the notebook he had on his desk, as if Nathan wasn't there at all. Nathan looked down at his knees, then at his fingers on the arms of the chair, then with some confused irritation back at the guy.

"You're letting me out of here?"

Mr. Fox looked down his nose and across the desk at him, then adjusted his glasses.

"Yes, Nathan. Your six weeks with us is almost at an end."

Nathan fidgeted. "But you're _letting_ me out," Nathan pressed. "Like, I passed?"

Mr. Fox pressed his lips together. "Yes, Nathan." 

Nathan made the faintest sound of affirmation. He wasn't sure how he was supposed to feel about that. He was glad, because being stuck in this place was lame as fuck and they kept trying to get him to talk about his feelings and how sorry he felt for shit like beating people up, but that was what happened in a gang war and if these idiots couldn't even understand that then they probably weren't qualified for this... whatever they were trying to do.

But he hadn't really done... anything... 

Maybe he had, but...

"Over the course of the next week, we will come up with a plan to allow you to ease back into your normal life," Mr. Fox said finally, breaking through into what was nagging at Nathan, but he hadn't been able to put into words himself.

He didn't know what was normal, so how the fuck was he supposed to go back to it?

\---

It was his mother who came to pick him up. It had been his father who had brought him to this place with a tirade of angry threats that had eventually dissolved into an painful silence halfway through the long drive to Boston. But it was mom who had come to take him home.

He didn't say anything when she approached him, though he frowned hard when she squished her arms around him, blabbering on about how she had missed him and how home hadn't been the same without him and she had been worried about him. He didn't know what he was supposed to say to any of that.

He didn't say anything as she signed his discharge forms, as she packed him up into the car, as they pulled out onto the highway. 

"Things are going to be different now," she was still rambling to him, forty minutes into the drive. "You can come home and we can go back to being a family. That program was so highly-rated, and you're happier already, I can just _tell_..."

Nathan scowled out the window, watching the grass and trees whirling by as quickly as his mother's words. He was looking forward to sleeping in his own bed.

\---

Being in Boston had made Nathan miss the first few days of eighth grade, and when he walked into first period on his first day back, he got strange looks from the other kids. 

His mom had written him notes to explain to each of his teachers that he needed to get the work he missed to catch up. When he entered the room, he approached the teacher's desk directly and pressed the note flat on the surface, sliding it over to her. Without waiting for her to read it or respond, he stomped to the back of the room and took a seat of his own choosing. 

Actually, his mom had told him to talk to the teachers himself, first. But that wasn't going to happen.

By lunch time, he was starting to feel something like normal, even though he still wasn't entirely sure what that was. He hadn't missed much and the school year was just starting. Fourth period brought with it some kid who had just transferred from some other state, somewhere lame like Idaho or something, and he was a little behind, too. But he hadn't been in a fucking rehab program for the past six weeks, so it was hard to relate his experience to Nathan's. _He_ hadn't been forced to spend five days in a jail, being threatened by murderers and drug dealers and gangbangers. He hadn't had to go to fucking therapy three days a week where people tried to force him to talk about his fucking gay feelings. He hadn't had every one of his life choices examined and chewed up and spit back out in his fucking face.

He hadn't spent the past six weeks being berated for doing something he'd never really wanted to do in the first place.

It was over now, though, and Nathan was past it. It had been more than a month, it was a new school year, and he could pretend none of it had ever happened. He'd never stabbed anyone, he'd never raped anyone because his _family_ was doing it, he'd never stolen. He'd never slashed up that idiot's face with a bottle. He'd never made his mother cry.

Nathan could be normal. Nathan was relieved. Even the nightmares had started to decreased over the past couple weeks, and last night, Nathan had actually slept peacefully in his own bed. 

The first day back at school had taken at least an eternity, but at the end of it, Nathan got his bag from his locker and wondered if he was supposed to just go home, or what. It seemed like as long as he could remember that he would just go straight to the hideout as soon as he got out of school, but he didn't have to do that anymore. It hadn't really been forever, anyway, right? It had been like a year and a half, maybe. 

It still felt like it was the only life he could remember.

He shuffled out of school, staring at his shoes and still wondering what the hell to do with his time, but he'd only made it to the edge of the sidewalk when someone slid out from the backside of a tree and grabbed his arm. Nathan's whole body tensed up like steel and the knife was out of his pocket, sharp and open in his palm before he even remembered moving, but instead of being met with fear, laughter erupted from Fish's lips. 

"Chill, River," Fish said, clapping him on the back. "Just came to welcome you back."

Ice sank into Nathan's heart and dread crept up into his throat like bile, but he said nothing. 

"C'mon, let's go home. We've been waiting for you," Fish said, and when he started off in the direction of the hideout, Nathan went with him, knowing that he didn't have a choice. Not really.


End file.
